Ebb Tide noun 1.The period between high tide and the next low tide 2. a low point or condition 3. a period or state of decline
It had been several weeks since my trip to New York with my boys and Reagan and a lot has happened since then. Things between she and I had been going a bit better.
We did manage to sneak away to Jamaica for a week or so before my album dropped. I had decided to change the title at the last minute to “The Streets”. It had debuted at number one and sold over four hundred thousand units that first week alone. I was mad busy with promotions and appearances pushing the album. I was hoping to take a nice long break after my upcoming world tour was over.
All I did was work and take meetings about my brand for my clothing, liquor and other endorsements I had in the works. Thankfully I had a good team of people behind me who knew what they were doing. Because if you didn’t know how to manage your brand, products, and revenue your ass would go broke. My homeboy Stacey was one of those super educated cats who graduated from Harvard Business School. He was not only behind the branding of 51/50, but he was also the president of 51/50. Of course I was CEO. Barrington didn’t like that Stacey was so high up in my company, but oh well Stacey had the skills to make moves and money while he didn’t, however he was still one of the best producers I have worked with. Barrington was good with beats not money, while Bryce had been handling the artistic side of my career pretty much since I made my first mix tape.
I had a promotional interview for MTV’s “Hip Hop Beat”. I was going to be interviewed by Jackson Marks. He was one of the few people who did press and interviews about hip hop that I could actually stand. I had been on his show several times in the past.
“Yo, thanks for coming out and being on the show,” Jackson greeted me as I took my seat on the set.
“Yeah, no problem, thanks for having me,” I replied.
“So first things first, congratulations on the success of your album going number one. I think the last time you were here you had just released “Stuntin’ On ‘Em”. You also changed the title of your album to “The Streets” at the last minute. Why don’t you give us all a rundown why and what the album is about for those you haven’t picked it up yet,” Jackson inquired.
“Yeah. Well since the first single dropped a lot has happened not just in my professional life but my personal one as well and I wanted to reflect that. I also wanted the album to not be all flash and kind of make it’s way back to where I started from. You know, just raw and keepin’ it real,” I responded to Jackson.
“I’ve noticed that as well with the album. Like you got the more gritty single “Body Bags” about what life was like for you growing up and that kind of offsets the more boastful tracks “Stuntin’ On ‘Em” and “Don’t Try It” where you’re kind of challenging your rivals out here and letting them know they could never be on your level,” said Jackson.
I kind of laughed. “Yep, well like I said you get to see both sides of my life, one that I grew up in and has shaped me to what I am today and you get to see that other side where I can rightfully rap about all my accomplishments,” I replied.
” I gotta ask, what is your take on Kiyan’s very much popular diss track he made aimed at you. Are you going to answer him back?” asked Jackson. I knew this question was going to come up, like it did in every interview I’ve done over the last several months.
“Look, this is not the first time someone has thrown shots at me. It won’t be the last. I’m doing something right to make the haters mad,” I answered.
“Does that mean you’re going to come out with your own answer track for him, or are you pretty much over it by now?” Jackson asked.
” I got other things that are more important right now. He keeps my name in his mouth, I guess he needs the publicity,” I replied coyly. Jackson asked me a few more questions about the so-called beef to which I gave vague responses. Shit all the money I paid my publicist wasn’t going wasted. I knew when to keep my mouth shut.
He inquired about the details of my world tour which I told him as much as I knew right now for all the details weren’t worked out yet and after about an hour the interview was over.
I was glad it was done, all these interviews were becoming the same now.
Reagan had been in and out of town a lot lately as well and matter of fact was in Paris right now for fashion week. This worked out well for me because my parents and my oldest sister were coming out for a little visit while I had a short break here at home. To be honest I really don’t know why Princess was coming out too, she had five kids to take care of back in New York. I loved my nieces and nephews, but I was glad she wasn’t bringing their bad asses out here this time.
“So, Princess what’s up? I’m glad to see you and all, but how come you’re out here and not in New York with the kids?” I asked her.
“What? Just ’cause I got kids mean I can’t travel nowhere? Keyshawn and Jamari are with they daddy. Ashley, Diamond, and Ciara are with they different grandmamas,” Princess answered defensively. My mom usually had the kids while Princess was clubbing or sleeping. Princess didn’t work and really wasn’t trying to do much with her life.
I guess I was enabling her. I supported her and her kids by sending her a check every month. Only one of her kids’ father was doing anything for them, and that was her sons’ dad. I knew I shouldn’t be taking care of her, but it was really for her kids’ sake. They didn’t have to live in the projects like I did as a kid. Pretty much everyone in my family except my parents had their hand out. My parents never asked for anything, but that didn’t stop me from sending my mom nice things from Nieman Marcus sometimes.
“Yeah you can go out of town. I was just surprised since they weren’t on break from school or anything,” I replied.
Princess rolled her eyes. “Well they being taken care of and going to school, shit it ain’t like I’m staying out here forever,” she said. Yeah they would never happen I thought to myself.
“Whatever happened to you getting a job? You said once Ciara was old enough to go to school, you were either going to go to school or get a job,” my father jumped in.
“What, is it “Gang up on Princess day” or something? Dang, Daddy Ciara just started school this past fall. I’ll look for a job or look into school soon,” Princess said defensively. I knew she was full of it and had no intention of doing jack.
“I’m going to take a nap,” Princess said and retreated upstairs.
“The food is ready,” my mom called from the kitchen.
“Where is Princess?” she asked as we sat at the table.
“She said she was tired,” my dad replied. My mom rolled her eyes.
“Tired from what? All she does is sleep anyway,” my mother said shaking her head.
“Anyway, Miho you’ve been quite the busy man. I was surprised you called us and said you had a few days off between all the business you’ve been tending to with the album,” my mother said changing the subject.
“Yep. It’s been non stop, even with these few days off, I still have things going on. I’ll start getting involved with the tour planning as well soon,” I said.
“Don’t they have people who handle that, Miho?” my mother asked.
“Yeah Mami, but you know I like to have control over my shows. Anything that is representing me or has my name on it has to be on point,” I answered her.
“Yeah baby, the boy works hard. He got folks working for him, telling them what to do, not the other way around,” my father added.
“So where is Miss Thang?” my mother asked referring to Reagan.
“Remember, Reagan is in Paris for fashion week. Mami, please let’s not start this. I don’t want to get into a discussion about her with you,” I replied.
My dad shot my mother a look as to say drop it. I had business to take care of in the morning so I went to bed right after dinner which I rarely did.
After dinner Princess woke up from her nap when my mother cornered her to complain about Reagan, she knew Princess wasn’t a fan of hers either.
“I really hope your brother comes to his senses about that girl. Oh I can’t stand that little smart mouth ass hussy!” my mother said.
“I don’t like her bougie ass either Mami, but shit Ra will get bored with her eventually, just like he always does. I don’t know why you didn’t punch her in the throat after she got smart with you,” replied Princess.
“I wanted to believe me. I just hope she don’t wind up pregnant, because I don’t want that girl no part of mi familia,” Mami said. “Please she ain’t tryin’ to get knocked up. Skinny vain bitches like her want to keep their figure,” said Princess.
My parents stayed for the next couple of days. Even though things were a bit chaotic, but it was nice having my mother cook my favorite foods. Princess decided she wanted to stay a little while longer and see my club promotional performance I was going to be doing.
My boy and fellow rapper ‘Lil Rob was flying in from New York and was going to be performing with me. He was one of the main producers on my latest album and he was featured on the album. We grew up in the same Queens projects and came up in the rap game at pretty much the same time.
‘Lil Rob was staying over at my house. Barrington and Bryce came by and we all decided to go to Winners, a sports bar club downtown. I turned it on KUTZ 97, one of the main hip hop radio stations out here. It was right in the middle of DJ Kazee and his crew’s afternoon show. I wasn’t surprised he had my name in his mouth. Sometimes I don’t know why I bothered with these radio stations, but it was a must if you were going to get any kind of air play or make it in this game.
DJ Kazee: …I personally think that diss Kiyan dropped helped promote Ra’s album, because it got everyone talking about it. Just face it, Ra has been falling off the last couple years…
Miss Gossip: What? How is Ra falling off? He moved four hundred thousand units his first week alone, I think that’s pretty damn good. I wouldn’t be surprised if he went platinum in the first month”
DJ Kazee: There was nothing else worthwhile coming out that same week, and four hundred thousand units ain’t jack considering this dude has done over a million within the first week. He’s been in the game a long time, he gotta battle with these newer and fresher contenders like Kiyan. Give him a couple of more years his numbers will be up there with Ra$hin’s.
I was instantly irritated. “Kazee always on the air talking shit but be skinnin’ and grinnin’ in your face when you see him in the clubs, I hate fake ass punks like him,” I said.
“You know Kazee always talks mess about everybody, Ra. He’s all up in Kiyan’s ass right now,” Bryce replied.
“Don’t even sweat that mess, he talks shit to get more listeners and make the regulars stay,” ‘Lil Rob said.
“He is irresponsible; making stuff up about how close Kiyan’s numbers are to mine and he only need a couple of more years to match me. Please, this boy got me twisted,” I said and turned off the radio.
Once we got to Winners ‘Lil Rob and I started a game of pool we made a little wager to make it more interesting. “What, you wanna play for quarters?” he asked.
“Yeah that’s cool,” I replied. I could see out the corner of my eye Barrington made a beeline for the bar like he usually does .
“So what’s been really going on my dude? I ain’t really seen you since we were in the studio together, we both been so busy with our own projects,” ‘Lil Rob asked.
I shrugged my shoulders. “Oh you know, same people, same shit,” I answered.
“How are things with you and that model chick, she lookin’ good. You on the come up in the female game!” he said.
“She got her on thang goin’ on. I got my own shit too. We don’t see a lot of each other but it’s cool,” I replied. The truth was there wasn’t a whole lot going on. After things had popped off with Kiyan several weeks ago in New York, I still felt some kind of way about that. I wasn’t sure where things were going with us all the time. Which is one of the reasons I still did my own thang on the side. That wasn’t going to change, I don’t care how good it was and Reagan was bomb, but a playa like me, I needed variety, what do they say? It’s the spice of life or some shit.
I didn’t feel like talking about female shit anyway, I came here to relax and Reagan would be back pretty soon. I could count on her to be bitchin’ about Princess or something else. Neither one of them better embarrass me out in public, Princess could get pretty ratchet and Reagan could too, she just knew when to cut it off and act like a lady when she needed to while my sister was always on some hoodrat shit.
I quickly changed the conversation to something else. ‘Lil Rob told me about what tracks he was working on for his own album coming out late this year and his new production deal.
I was in a better mood now because I was winning. Very few people could beat me at pool.
“Yeah, you better pay up too playboy and I don’t accept checks,” I told him laughing.
“Whatever, yeah I got you,” ‘Lil Rob answered back.
We both headed over to the bar to where Barrington was nursing probably his sixth or seventh drink. He was pretty much loaded by now. I finished ordering my drink when Barrington stumbles over to me. I was expecting him to start ranting about some stupid worthless crap But that wasn’t what he was talking about at all.
“Yo, you know you my dog man, I love you just like a brother,” he slurred.
“But there is something you should know, something I should have told you about nearly two months ago,” Barrington continued. I had no clue what he was talking about and I wished he would get to the point already because I didn’t really like talking to drunk people.
“What is it?” I asked
“Yo, your little woman man, she ain’t down for you at all dog,” Barrington said through a couple of hiccups.
“What are you talking about ‘B?” I asked.
“Yo, when you ain’t around that bitch likes to get hella freaky and shit. I would watch her if I was you. On New Year’s, at the party, she was all up in my face, but I told she needed to back the fuck up ’cause you my dog,” he replied. This was the last thing I expected him to say about Reagan especially considering how much Reagan couldn’t stand him. She had been acting peculiar whenever he was around the last several weeks when we were all together.
“What exactly do you mean?” I asked Barrington, I was getting agitated and I could feel my face getting hot.
“Man, she was tryin’ to grab all over my shit man, like I said she a freaky bitch. I mean she had a few drinks, but if you got hoe like tendencies in you anyway, it will eventually come out. Shit, look at the way she was grinding up on Kiyan in the club,” he replied. I sighed heavily.
Reagan was a bit tipsy at the party and she could get a little flirty when she had been drinking. My ears didn’t want to hear what Barrington was telling me. I didn’t want to know what he was telling me. I had no reason to doubt my boy, he had never lied to me and I’ve known ‘B since we were kids. You could rarely trust females. Barrington pointing out Reagan dancing with Kiyan got me to wondering if it was as serious as he was saying because he had been pretty loaded himself that night.
I waited a long time before I chose my next words. “What did you do when she was acting like that?” I asked, not really wanting to hear the answer but needed to nonetheless.
“Like I said dog, I told her to back up off me cause I wasn’t feeling her like that,” said Barrington.
“Why did you wait so long to tell me this?” I asked him. Barrington just sort of shrugged.
“Cause man, with all the stuff going on with the album dropping and promotions, I wanted you to stay focus and honestly I had pushed it out of my mind for the longest. You just need to be careful where she is concerned, that trick can’t be trusted,” he said.
I didn’t know what I was going to do with this information. I decided to just squash it for now. I had too many things coming up and I didn’t have time for no relationship drama. I would just sit back and observe the situation once Reagan got back to town.
A couple of days had passed and what Barrington had told me about Reagan was still weighing on my mind. It was actually messing with my head more than I thought it would.
‘Lil Rob had some business of his own to take care of in town, so I meet up with Barrington to check out the club that I was going to be performing at the next night. Club Nirvana was one of the more exclusive clubs downtown. My performance was invitation only. Bryce had already taken care of everything as my manager but I always liked to check things out for myself. After I spoke with the manager about some of the final arrangements I went out into the club and stage area.
That’s where I spotted this one little Puerto Rican mami I had met at The Rodeo some months back named Martina. I went up to her. “What’s up Mami, remember me?” I asked her, shit how could she forget.
Martina gave me a flirtatious smile “Hi! It’s good to see you again. I wasn’t expecting you in here until tomorrow,” she replied. I remembered that she had told me a while back she did promotions for this club.
“So you’re going to be at the concert then?” I asked as I was looking her up and down and admittedly enjoying what I saw.
“Of course I wouldn’t miss it for the world. That’s one of the perks of being a promoter, I get to see all the performances here. I’m really digging your album too Papi, it stays on repeat,” she giggled.
That was good to hear, it was nice knowing I had a fan, especially a fine one like her.
“Thank you for supporting the album, I’m glad you’re feeling it,” I replied.
We shot the breeze for a couple of more minutes she told how she and her twin just rented a house in an exclusive neighborhood in the hills. She said she had a few things to take care around the club and was looking forward to seeing me on stage tomorrow night.
Barrington walks over to me, I could smell beer on his breath, but he wasn’t drunk, at least not yet. “Hey, wasn’t that that one female you met at The Rodeo a few months ago?” he asked. “Yeah,” I replied. Barrington got a sneaky look on his face. “Well, shit did you get the digits, I know she is down, it’s written all over her face,” Barrington said laughing.
“Nah, but I know where she works,” I said indicating I could contact her anytime I wanted.
The next morning I got a text from Reagan saying she was being held up and would be arriving late and she and her friends would just meet me at the club instead of going there with me.
As I was waiting for the car service to pick us up tonight, I saw Princess had raided my bar. “Damn Princess, you need to slow down with that, you know they serve alcohol at the club,” I told her irritated, I didn’t need her to be getting drunk and the damn show ain’t even started yet.
” I knows how to handle my liquor I ain’t no lightweight. Shit, I like to get my drank on before I get to the club. I don’t know what kind of weak ass drinks they serve there. You need to be gettin’ down on some of ‘dis, and chill the hell out. Messin’ with that bougie broad got you all uptight,” she said taking the bottle to the head.
“Princess, this club is one of the most exclusive places in the city, they serve the best alcohol you can find. None of that OE you favor,” I told her. “This ain’t OE. And don’t be trying to act like yo’ ass didn’t grow up in the projects, you would drink it too,” she replied.
“Yeah well I was young and it was cheap, the point is I don’t drink that mess now,” I said. I was tired of this back and forth with Princess, she always did what she wanted to do and I didn’t need any distractions going into my performance tonight, thankfully the limo service had finally gotten here and we headed to the club.
All of my invited guests showed up, the club was pretty packed. ‘Lil Rob and I got on stage and started off with some of my classics while ‘Lil Rob was hyping the crowd and joining in with me on some of the verses. I was starting to get really hot so I took off my shirt. The crowd was really jumping and going crazy. A lot of my friends were in the crowd but there were also some hip hop writers and bloggers I invited for publicity.
As I started rapping some of my songs off my third and fourth albums the crowd was rapping each line word for word with me. In between songs I took the opportunity to throw some shots back at Kiyan. “You know, this shit right here, all the people up in here tonight are real. You know why I know? Cause I don’t fuck with no little punk bitches still drinking they mama’s breast milk and dropping nursery rhymes online!” I yelled into the mic.
Some of the people in the crowd started chanting “Fuck Kiyan” on their own. “Yeah, yeah, this is for real mofo’s not bitches!” I said pumping the crowd up. ‘Lil Rob and I then went into a special track I made just weeks ago answering Kiyan’s weak diss. It wasn’t on the official album and no one other than my team knew about it. I could see some of the bloggers already Tweeting about the track. Good, I knew it would spread like wildfire online in no time. After we were done with that song I started performing my newer material.
The show had lasted about two hours and I was ready to take my ass home afterward, but I had to deal with a few press interviews backstage. The writers and bloggers of course asked me about the diss track to which I just said that was my response point, blank, period. When I was asked why did I wait so long to respond to Kiyan, I said I had been too busy with more important things and you can’t always give children the attention they want when they are throwing a tantrum.
“And you can quote me on that,” I told Mike O’Shea from Real Hip Hop magazine.
I wasn’t going to any after parties or none of that shit, all my friends headed to another club but I was straight. I hopped in the limo with Reagan and my sister and we headed home.
I had a feeling something had popped off between them because they seemed to be more icy towards each other than usual but they weren’t saying anything.
Once we got inside Princess headed upstairs. Reagan comes over to me with an attitude. “I cannot stand your sister! She comes up to me in the club tonight talking all kinds of mess, in my face. Like I wasn’t down for you and she was surprised I even came to the performance tonight,” Reagan complained. I was tired and not up for this.
“Reagan, I’m tired and I don’t feel like hearing you complain about my sister. You know how she is. Why are you acting surprised?” I said, it was more a statement than a question.
“So it’s ok that she just comes up to me and starts to disrespect me?” Reagan asked.
“Look, knowing both of you I’m pretty sure I can’t pinpoint which one of you started it, because you both like to talk shit. I don’t feel like regulating some kindergarten bull,” I replied.
“You always take your family’s side over mine, whatever Ra$hin,” she said.
I left Reagan downstairs and headed up to bed where my sister was smoking on the second floor landing obviously hearing everything Reagan had said.
“Look little brother, I’m going to tell you like this…” Princess said through drags. “You need to leave that heffa alone. You need a chick who ain’t obsessed with herself, but is willing to ride for you, and that skank ain’t it. She done used you for some publicity and has gotten pretty famous. She runnin’ all kind of game, but game recognize game, and I know that bitch is as fake as those extensions she got in her hair,” Princess continued.
“Yeah well, there’s other shit going on I’m choosing not to deal with just yet because I’m too busy with my music. I don’t want to hear the details of whatever little catfight y’all had tonight. I’m tired and just wanna go to sleep,” I replied.
“That’s cool. Just remember what I said. Oh and make sure you check with the club if they done found my earrings. I paid twenty dollars for those mugs,” she said. Apparently Princess lost her earrings somewhere which was nothing new.
“Wow ‘P, you act like they real gold or something. Anyway I’m out, bout to go to sleep. ‘Night,” I replied and went to bed.
Princess stayed at the house for a few more days before heading back to New York. I loved my sister but I was glad to see her go. I had enough female drama with Reagan and their being around each other was impossible. Other than the night of the concert Reagan hadn’t slept over, but once Princess left she came over to stay the night.
I still didn’t know what I was going to do about this whole New Year’s Eve. I had too much on my plate right now to deal with it. Reagan wanted to know what was bothering me. I just told her I had a lot on my mind which was true. But I was starting to look at Reagan a bit differently.
I still had the feeling that whatever trust I had in her before had been shaken. I never completely trusted females outside my own family anyway, so if everything went down exactly like Barrington said it did, it wouldn’t surprise me. I just knew if she wanted to stay on my team she better get her shit together, because I would drop her ass and not think twice about it.
********** Reagan’s Point of View **********
Paris fashion week was extremely hectic. My flight back to Starlight Shores had been delayed and I arrived home much later than I had intended. I ended up meeting the girls at Club Nirvana where Ra was giving a promotional concert for special invited guests.
I had seen Ra$hin perform several times before, but not like this. I could tell there was something on his mind, something that was bugging him and the way he was performing shows he was wanting to let off steam. His friend and another rapper named ‘Lil Rob was performing with him and acting as his hype man at the same time. I didn’t really know him, I had met him maybe once or twice before. He seemed okay.
It was good being at home while both Ra and I had a small break in our schedules. I knew Ra$hin’s parents had just left before I got back, thank goodness, but his ratchet sister Princess was still here and was at the concert tonight. She and I didn’t exactly get along. She was a ghetto hood-rat that lived off Ra’s money and was lazy as hell.
On top of her being there, I also saw that thirsty ass groupie Martina Meija. She did promotions for the club so that’s how she was allowed in here tonight, because she was certainly a nobody.
After Ra’s performance was over he headed backstage to chill for a minute and did a couple of interviews. I stayed in the club part and chatted with some of the people there. That’s when Princess decided to come and get in my face. I could never have any peace.
“I just want you to know the next time you disrespect my mama like you did, I’ll break your little ass in half,” she said.
“No, but you can get rolled up in this bitch, trust that. I ain’t trying to start nothing right now cause my baby brother just had his concert and shit. You just better watch yo’ back. I know you ain’t down for him no way and only here to get your name on Twitter and Instagram pictures tonight,” Princess said.
It wasn’t a good look for me to get into it with someone as hood and ghetto as Princess, besides I was tired from a long flight and week in Paris. I dismissed her with a wave of my hand and joined my friends and waited for Ra so we could go home.
Later on that night I had told Ra about Princess starting in with me but he wasn’t trying to hear me. Oh well, there was something funky with him and it wasn’t just the stress of the album and all the promotion he had to do.
I went back to my house the next morning, I refused to stay under the same roof as Princess. Kennedey was out of town on some sort of art exhibit expo tour or whatever it was called, I wasn’t really paying attention when she told me about it. One of our neighbors was cat-sitting Sammy and Tinky. Even though I was back in town, I was going to wait and let Kennedey get them when she got home.
Later on that week I went to a cosmetics launch party. I’ve been to dozens, they were all pretty much the same with the same people. Taina was there too and we decided to ditch the party and go to Winners. This was the perfect time to pick her brain about Ra. I gave her a rundown on how he had been acting since I got home and how distant he had sounded when we spoke on the phone.
“Do you think there is someone else? I hate to see you guys going through this again especially since things have been going so well the last couple of months,” Taina said.
“Yeah I know. I mean we’ve both been busy, nothing new there, but he has been more so than me since the album came out. I don’t know. I don’t get the feeling like he is seeing someone else. But shoot, who knows what he does one hundred percent of the
time on the road. I refuse to worry myself about that. But if he ever were to cheat and let me find out about it, we would be over like that,” I said snapping my fingers.
“You know, there is always the possibility that Barrington said something to him about New Year’s but of course turned it around,” Taina said. I had thought about that myself. But if he did, why now and why not when it happened? I was still unsure if I did the right thing about keeping my mouth shut.
“Reagan, the only way you’re going to know is if you ask Ra exactly what’s up. Maybe you should’ve told him about it,” she said.
“Yeah and then I would’ve risked the possibility of coming in between them and having Ra resent me for it,” I replied. We stayed at Winners for another hour or so by the time I got home I still wasn’t sure what I should do or what was really going on with Ra$hin and his attitude with me.
I had an early meeting the next day with my agent Charlie. But before I headed over to his office I decided to take a little drive to clear my head as I hadn’t been sleeping much lately. I wound up at the beach, yes it was still winter outside but it wasn’t too cold out. The water calmed me and made me think of the happier times in my childhood when my dad would take Kennedey and me swimming. I suddenly thought about what my father said the last time I had seen him, that since he was a man, he could read other men better than women.
I looked at my phone contemplating if I should spill my worries to my dad, it was bad enough he didn’t like Ra$hin so I didn’t know what kind of useful advice he would give me other than to break up with Ra.
“Hello?” my father answered on the other end of the line sounding groggy.
“Daddy? Did I wake you up? It’s me Reagan,” I spoke into my phone. I could hear him sniffling on the other end.
“Oh hey baby. No you didn’t wake me up, you know I am an early riser. I just got a little head cold that’s all,” Dad replied.
“Oh okay, good. I mean it’s not good you’re feeling poorly…” I trailed off.
“Ginger baby, what’s the matter? It’s not like you to call me so early. And it’s still very early out there,” my dad inquired. I sighed, nervous to tell my father what had been going on.
“I know you don’t care for Ra$hin Daddy, but he is still my boyfriend. He’s been acting weird towards me lately. I know he is stressed with his music and all but he seems preoccupied with something else,” I said it fast all in one breath. I then told my dad about Barrington and what he had done and that I was worried if I had done the right thing by keeping my mouth shut. “So do you think Barrington tried to lie and say it was me coming on to him?” I asked.
“First I am sorry you had to go through that. Barrington better hope he and I never meet on the streets. It’s a possibility that he said something to Ra. It’s pretty obvious that Barrington is envious of his friend,” my father replied.
“Do you think he is cheating on me and that’s why he is acting strange?” I asked.
There was a moment of silence on the other end of the line, I could tell my father was thinking.
“Baby, you’re a smart girl. In this whole hip hop lifestyle women and groupies come with the territory. It doesn’t make it right or give a man a pass to cheat, I don’t care how famous he is, but just know it’s possible Ra$hin hung onto that part of the life even after he got serious with you. It could be that or a combination of things including this thing with his so- called friend. I can’t say for sure what is in Ra$hin’s mind, I don’t know his character well enough. I just know I have never had a good feeling about him. What you need to do baby is put on your big girl panties and ask him straight up everything you have suspicions about. If he tries to shuck and dive or brush you off you definitely have something to worry about and you need to lose him. You don’t need to have these kinds of things stressing your mind, you’re too young for that,” Dad replied.
I took in what he said and it made a lot of sense. I don’t know why I had been so apprehensive about approaching the subject with Ra$hin. Daddy was right, if I was going to find out anything I needed to talk to Ra directly and see exactly what was up and if Barrington did lie on me. This was the kind of thing that could make us or break us, I guess I would have to see which one it was going to be.